I see and feel loneliness all around me. As a carer and support person, I am intimately present to the loneliness of close family and friends, but also to colleagues, clients and the people I come across in my daily life.

One of my dearest friends had a complex array of mental health challenges for many years and shared with me about feeling lonely and misunderstood by others. I feel the social isolation and loneliness of COVID-19’s lockdowns was a key element of her devastating suicide in 2020.

My parents divorced when I was a toddler, and mum has struggled to find stable and supportive relationships. Her stoic independence is a superpower in some ways, but when coupled with mental and physical health challenges, it’s also led her to isolate from key people in her life. In my view, what’s helped mum has been a willingness to ask close family and friends for help, engaging with appropriate professionals and improving her habits around her health, movement and consumption.

Personally, I’ve experienced loneliness too. Getting bullied for expressing emotion and not ‘fitting in’ during school. Feeling demotivated by university and avoiding attendance. Working in the betting industry and feeling disconnected from the space and the people within it. Misalignment in previous intimate relationships. Socially exhausted, isolated and vulnerable during solo travels.

Today, I feel much less lonely and better connected than ever. Outside of my amazing partner and our family and friends, a healthy balance of self-love and service to others are the natural antidotes to loneliness for me. Learning to love my intricacies has helped me accept myself more and enjoy my alone time. It has also created space for others to love and accept me in my full expression. And by focussing on supporting others – primarily through my work in mental health – I feel supported, and I now get to live a more purposeful and fulfilled life within community.